


Is it me?

by donttrydontcare



Category: SKAM (TV)
Genre: Jonas's Thoughts, M/M, Other, Possibly Unrequited Love, SKAM
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-11-27
Updated: 2016-11-27
Packaged: 2018-09-02 16:18:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8674210
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/donttrydontcare/pseuds/donttrydontcare
Summary: He’s got a chick. I couldn’t help but feel like I had more time. Like I was comforted in some sort of way. The fact that Even had a girlfriend and he would be stuck with having to choose between her and Isak. It made me feel like I had more time to get used to seeing him with someone else. Everytime he was with a girl, I knew that he was not attracted to her. But now was different.





	

I had always wondered. It was not like I did not suspect anything everytime Isak complimented me warily, touched me gently or even comforted me for all the right reasons. The question had still been running through my mind several hours later. The thing was that it wasn't really like that. I just figured that this was Isak. This was how Isak acted and behaved towards everyone. This was his personality, and this was who he was going to be forever. Still I could not help but ask _if it was me._

"You? No! No, no, no! What the fuck?" Isak's blonde hair bounced and cheeks reddened a bit as he laughed off the awkward question. I smiled genuinly and laughed myself.

“Well, I don’t fucking know? You’ll just have to tell me.” I paused for a second and laughed more.

“No, no, no, no.” I said mimicking him. “Am I really that unattractive?”

I watched him closely while eating my kebab, and he answered fast almost regretting how he answered my first question. I was amused.

“No! Not like that.. but it’s not you.”

I laughed but his smile vansihed, and I knew that our little small talk, best friend to best friend was over. I took another bite of mye kebab. Of course it had to be the guy from the revue group thing with Vilde. Even bringing my caps to Isak really brought it to light.

“Is it the guy from the revue group Vilde had?”

“Yes.”

I looked down at my plate and thought of what to say.

“What’s his name?”

“Even.”

Once again I was the one left with nothing to say. Staring at my kebab and thinking what the hell could I say to him?

“I guess he is a.. handsome.. handsome guy.”

Isak laughed straight away and looked at me with a huge smile that showed the set of his teeth.

“What?” He said still looking at me and smiling.

“Yeah.. what am I supposed to say then?” I laughed tentatively.

“I don’t even know myself.” Isak looked away.

With my eyes locked once again down on my kebab I asked him another question. He turned to me as I started speaking.

“But.. what is happening between you two?”

He looked away and all of sudden it was very serious again. I just couldn’t focus on anything else except for him. His dark eyes looking into the distance searching for answers, his mind finding the words, and his lips waiting to part so that he could let them out. Oh god.. _his lips-_

“I don’t really know.” His words snapped me out of my thoughts.

“I don’t understand shit, ‘cause he is the back and forth type of guy. And also, he’s got a chick.” With the final words he looked at me with little to no emotion, and waited for a reply. I could see right through him. He was tired.

“Oh,” was the only thing I managed to say before I turned to my food and started eating again. A big fat silence stretched between us two and the tension was suddenly back again. I looked at him in between bites of my food, but he didn’t.

 _He’s got a chick._ I couldn’t help but feel like I had more time. Like I was comforted in some sort of way. The fact that Even had a girlfriend and he would be stuck with having to choose between her and Isak. It made me feel like I had more time to get used to seeing him with someone else. Everytime he was with a girl, I knew that he was not attracted to her. But now was different.

I felt my phone vibrating in my pocket and I cursed at myself for even thinking in that selfish kind of way.

“I think it’s mine.” I said as I watched Isak take out his own phone from his pocket, probably thinking it was his call. With his phone followed a sheet of paper.

As I answered my phone recognizing the voice of Mahdid from anywhere, he asked about a party, but i declined the offer. The rest of the conversation went blank and I couldn’t help but watch the drawing Isak held in his hands. While I sat my phone in my pocket I turned to the picture.

“What’s that?”

“It’s from Even.”

I looked at him and then at the picture again. It was a guy holding a cardamom-free grilled cheese sandwich in his hand on the left side of the sheet, and on the right side of the sheet it was two guys holding grilled cheese sandwiches with cardamom on them.

_Same time somewhere else in the universe._

I didn’t understand what it meant, and I probably never would. I turned back to my food and decided to say what Isak wanted to hear.

“He’s got to break up with the chick, man.” I said as I turned to Isak and looked at him smiling from ear to ear. He looked back at me, smiling. Turning his head back to the picture I could see him focus on it and smiling occasionally. His mouth would turn up mostly on the left side and sometimes he would smile with his teeth. His eyes would crinkle out on the edges and he would scrunch up his nose a bit if he felt something was funny. Sometimes he would even whey when he tried to read a text because he actually had bad sight, but never wanted to get glasses so he decided to never tell anybody about it except for me. I always told him that his sight would get even worse, but he would just joke about it and say that since we were basically an old married couple, I would help him do normal stuff. Like reading the news paper and see the little texts on the conditioner and shampoo bottles when he was about to wash his hair in the shower.

Maybe I was too late.


End file.
